Konoha's Daycare Center
by YuzukiSakura1994
Summary: The number one mission everyone detests-the mission to Konoha's Daycare Center. Behold! Even the sannins weep, the Akatsuki trembles and Orochimaru shriecks. What's so terrible? They're just babies, right? WRONG.
1. The Nightmare Of KDC

**Disclaimer:** If i own Naruto, this story would'nt even be _here_.

**Summary:** Behold! This story brings out the true terror of babies...how will our heroes( and villans) deal with them?

* * *

**Konoha's Daycare Center I- The Nightmare of Konoha Daycare Center**

All was peaceful in Konohagakure, the hidden village of the leaves. Tsunade, their Godaime Hokage, was currently having a mental battle with the greatest enemy of all kages- paperwork. She sighed as she signed another document and took a slip of her once-warm sake.

A knock on the door was heard. 'Enter' she called. She sighed again as the door opened to reveal her second headache- Uzumaki Naruto. " Tsunade-no-baachan!" He screamed. Tsunade groaned. This was going to be a loooong day.

"Team 7 has finished their mission report then." Tsunade took another slip of sake. "Good job. Now, I will assign you a new mission." Tsunade chuckled madly in her mindscape as her eyes spotted an interesting assignment on the D-rank scroll.

"Yosh! New mission, new mission!" Naruto chanted happily. "What is it, Baa-chan? Bring it on, I, Uzumaki Naruto, soon-to-be Hokage of this village, Konoha, will accept any mission with ease!"

" Naruto, shut up!" Sakura yelled. The rest of team 7 entered the Hokage's office, catching up with Naruto.

" Usuratonkachi, keep quiet, or I'll _make_ you quiet!" Sasuke snarled. Yep, team 7 was a real headache. Kakashi sighed and hurriedly hid his 'icha-icha paradise' book away from the eyes of the Godaime before she loses her temper at the noise that his students are making and rant her feelings by stuffing his precious book into the grinder, just because he didn't stop them. After all, the book reminded her of her perverted teammate in the first place. It's a wonder why Tsunade didn't ban the books from being published in Konoha. To his surprise, however, she was smirking.

" The next mission is a D-rank." Tsunade gleefully announced. "You will have to help take care of the babies in _Konoha's Daycare Center_!"

Shocked silence. Then, "NANI?" Naruto exploded. Sakura was spluttering and Sasuke turned white. Babies? Bald, puny disgusting babies? Worse, hundreds of babies. Babysitting? Them? You've got to be kidding me. The mere thought of it is horrible, to say the least.

"Well? What'cha doing? Go Go Go! The babies are awaiting your arrival, oh great babysitters!!" Tsunade laughed at the swollen faces team 7 were giving her.

* * *

" …" 

Team 7 found themselves in a sea of baldheads. Sakura was the only one who was coping well. Kakashi was trying to think up some lame excuse to escape from this hellhole, Naruto was paralyzed with fear at the sight of the babies, and Sasuke was glaring daggers at any baby the came within 60 centimeters of his radius. The Uchiha death glare could only permit it until this far, so he'll have to make a do with it.

"You guys better get your act together this instant! This is for the sake of our mission!" Sakura, having enough, snapped.

" But Sakura-Chaaaaaaaaaan…!" Naruto whined. Spotting Asuma and Kurenai at a dango stall at the opposite end, Kakashi got a gleam in his eye as a brilliant idea flashed into mind. " Ahh, I am sooooo sorry, but I remembered I have something very important to discuss with the other jonins. So then, Bye!" He poofed out to pester the jonin couple before his students could catch him and strangle him to his death for abandoning them.

"Baka-sensei." Sakura sniffed and turned around to scan what her other teammates were doing. After all, you can't trust boys with this kind of job. "SASUKE-KUN!!" she suddenly shrieked out, horrified at the scene she saw. For the first time in history, the famous Uchiha death glare was overpowered and poor Sasuke was drowning in a pile of babies. The only part of him visible is his left arm, which was frantically trying to grab and toss the babies away, to no avail. There were just too many of them.

Sakura went to him, with difficulty, and yanked him out. Naruto was having a laughing fit on the floor, which make him an easy target for the babies. Sure enough, he too got swamped a few seconds later, his laughter turning into a chocking fit. Sakura sighed and started digging through the pile for her other teammate.

" Serves you right, dope." Sasuke was still embarrassed at being defeated by a pile of 5 months old. They can't even talk yet, for heaven's sake! Suddenly, he scooted to a corner as more babies happily advanced towards him. " EEEEEEEEKK!" Naruto finally surfaced just in time to hear the Uchiha give off a high sissy like shriek. Babies were pulling his hair now. " Not the hair! Anything but the hair!" He shrieked as his tried to whack the little terrors off him.

Naruto groaned groggily. His brain was still a little woozy after his mishap. ' This place is crazy to make an Uchiha behave like this.' He thought. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the Uchiha stilled as one baby yanked out a chunk of his precious Uchiha groomed hair happily. Oops, wrong move kiddo.

"Sakura-chan! Evacuate immediately!" Naruto, currently the only sane one of the group, created several kage bunshins and each of them grabbed a handful of wailing babies and jumped into the daycare's courtyard. Sasuke finally lost his mind and went berserk at the thought of his well-kept hair in a disheveled state and roared.

"KATON: GOKAKYUU NO JUTSU!!!"

Sakura was screaming her head off and Naruto watched in awe as the daycare center was roasted. "Sasuke-kun! Look at what you've did!!" Sakura was in hysterics. Sasuke regained his emo composure and shrugged. " Teme…" Naruto eyed the fire warily. "Oi Sasuke-teme, can you put it out?"

"No." Only now did Sasuke realize the seriousness of his mistake.

"WE'RE DOOMED!!" Naruto and Sakura cried.

* * *

A patrolling chuunin helped them put out the fire. Now, team 7 looked at the courtyard full of crying babies. "Now what?" they asked themselves.

* * *

"This is team 7 reporting in. Mission status: Completed." Sasuke drawled to their Hokage, just outside her office. 

"Good job, then. There will be no more missions for you today. You're all dismissed." Tsunade eyed all of them suspiciously. So fast? She looked at them as they presented her with triumphant and wide grins. She decided to ignore them for now and opened her office door. And blinked. There, her Hokage's office was littered with hundreds of babies.

"You-" she turned just in time to see Naruto cheekily waved goodbye and slammed the door shut, locking it from the outside. She blinked in shock at her current situation. "COME BACK HERE, NARUTO!!!" She thundered. She could vaguely hear muffled laughter at the opposite side. She also noted that the windows were barred. Curse that idiotic brat.

* * *

Tsunade was slumped over her Hokage's desk. She felt like punching something- anything!- at the moment, but that would mean destroying her office, so no. Babies were crawling over her now. 

" Kukukuku…Tsunade, I have proclamation to make for you." Orochimaru decided to make his entrance known and entered through the door. Tsunade straightened up and brushed off the dangling babies. Boy, this was one of the few times she was glad to see Orochimaru here.

" Ahhh… Orochimaru, what can I help you with?" Tsunade smirked. She had a hunch on what he was about to say and if she was correct…

" I'll make this quick then, Tsunade. Give the position of Hokage to me."

" Fine. However you can have it only if you fulfill my request." Orochimaru blinked. Did he hear correctly? Tsunade giving up without a fight?

" I agree. The request?"

Gotcha! Tsunade rubbed her hands in glee. " Stay in this office for the day, without coming out. Oh, and don't destroy anything, I want it in its current state when I come back." She hurried to the opened door, wanting a drink of sake with Jiraiya, a day off from paperwork and also eager to be rid of clingy babies.

Orochimaru's brain took several minutes to process his current situation. He eyes surveying the occupants he was stuck with for the day. After all, we can safely say that his brain size is equivalent to that of a snakes'. Correction, a small garden snake. Then- " DAMN YOU, TSUNADE!" could be heard all the way from Konoha to Oto.

* * *

" Orochimaru? Heeellloooooo? Orochimaru?"

Tsunade and Jiraiya's heads peeked through from the door. What they saw made them roll on the floor, laughing at the current state their former teammate was in.

There, lay the famed snake sanin, the terror of Konoha, and the leader of Otogakure. There, lay Orochimaru, half dead on the floor. His eyes were glazed over but yet he was surprisingly still conscious. Babies were latched onto his robes, pants, belt, earings, every part of his body they could get a grip on.

"Ts-Tsu-Tsu-na-de…"He hissed angrily and struggled to stand up, which was a feat itself, with so many 'weights' attached on him. He received no reply as Tsunade was still on the floor, trying-and failing- to regain her composure.

"Hahaha, look at you, Orochimaru, hahaha!" Jiraiya was trying to breathe. They then burst into howls of laughter again, to Orochimaru's irradiance, as the babies merrily started playing game of merry-go-round with his hair. Orochimaru snarled and wiped them off, chunks of his hair coming off too in the process, making his appearance even more hilarious. His makeup was now ruined and his face was now blotchy and smudged up. Eew.

"Urrggh! Get OFF ME!" Orochimaru started plucking the babies off him, one by one. He glared at his former teammates as they struggled to regain their breaths. They were Konoha's well-respected sanins, after all. Sanins cannot behave like this, where did all their dignity went to? Yet, they burst out laughing again as a baby peeked out from the folds of Orochimaru's robes, adding the Orochimaru's already hilarious image, looking practically innocent.

"SHUT UP, BOTH OF YOU!!" Orochimaru screamed as his face turned so red it could rival one of Hinata's strongest blushes. To see that color on Orochimaru's colorless face was really unnerving. Jiraiya only howled louder in response. Orochimaru's eye twitched- this was a major blow to his pride. He'll really, really kill them next time. For now, he'd better get the hell outta here. Tossing the last baby off, Orochimaru fled and kept his distance from Konoha and babies forever.

Especially babies. Who ever knew that they could be so horrifying?

o o o **END** o o o

* * *

**Authors Notes:** Well...we made the babies look like leeches and some sort of disgusting species, didn't we? Its more like Konoha's Babysitters, didn't have a lot of toddlers...nevermind.Anyways, can you picture the Orochimaru scene? I can't help but laugh at that part where he goes "Ts-Tsu-Tsunade..". Looks like even legendary sanins have team moments!(Awww... ). Well...**review** and look out for the next chapter: **K**onoha **D**aycare **C**enter **II**!


	2. Not again! KDC II

**Notes:** Well...This takes place when Naruto casts are all in shippuuden and after Sasuke killed Orochimaru already.

**Disclaimers:** Naruto isn't mine...neither is the daycare, if it really exists in the first place...

* * *

"Good Job, Team Kakashi." Tsunade, Konoha's Godaime, took a slip of her sake and surveyed her apprentice flanked by her teammates. Team Kakashi was currently standing at attention after the completion of a B-rank mission. 

"As you know, Konoha is rather peaceful now that Sasuke did the world a favor by killing that troublesome snake, thus, Konoha has been receiving lesser and lesser missions lately." Tsunade sighed and took a big gulp of sake. Less threats, less missions, less money, and less gambling for the Hokage…damn.

"And…?"

Tsunade mentally prepared herself for a big explosion over what she was about to tell them. "Thus, I would like you all to go for a D-rank mission."

She closed her eyes count. Her words should sink in in 1... 2…3…

"NANI?" screamed Konoha's Number One Hyperactive Most Surprising Ninja, Uzumaki Naruto. Did I forget to add loudmouth? Yeah, that too.

"Naruto, shut up!" Naruto's violent pink haired teammate, Haruno Sakura screamed back. She pushed her teammate into a bow, chocking him and at the same time, hissing "If you want to live longer, you'd better shut up _now_!"

Naruto flailed his arms wildly in an attempt to breath. Sakura let go. "But Shishou, the last time I checked, there was a few A-ranks, we could-"

"Those A-ranks are for my jonins and ANBUs. The last B-rank were given to Shikamaru, so you'll just have to stick with the D-ranks." Tsunade cut Sakura off.

"What about C-ranks?"

"Don't have any to spare."

"…Aw man…this sucks."

"Further more, your team have experience in this matter, and must I add that Genins should take on Genin missions?"

Naruto sat on the floor huffily and pouted in the corner at the unjust.

"But Shishou, Sai and Yamato-taichou can make up for Naruto's weakness…"Sakura still refused to take up a D-rank.

"May I remind you I got trained from one of the legendary sanins?" Naruto's voice came from the back of the room.

"Jiraiya doesn't count- bet you just learn how to peep on women."

"HEY!"

"It's a big pity to have this dickless wonder on our team then. My last D-rank was 6 years ago." Sai probed Naruto with a toe.

" Why you…" Naruto had a stress mark on his head as he tried to pounce on Sai, but was successfully held back by Yamato-taichou, Team Kakashi's captain. Tsunade banging her fist on her desk stopped their tiff. They got back into attention. Tsunade carried on.

"Your mission will be babysitting-" Naruto and Sakura's screams of terror interrupted her. They were never the same after coming back from their last trip from the daycare. Neither was Tsunade.

"WHAT? You know I hate babies! You know baa-chan, you're already fifty plus. Act like someone your age, those kind sweet old ladies who bake brownies. Give me a A-rank already! No wonder people call you a baa-baa. An ONI BAA-BAA!" Naruto lost his temper and screamed. His was never going to baby-sit ever again! _Ever_!

"Naruto! Apologize!" Sakura screamed. _We're gonna die… We're gonna die… We're gonna die_…!She thought frantically.

Yamato gulped. Naruto sure got guts to call the Hokage that. Well, I'd better get my will ready then.

"What…did you just call me…?"

BAM. Everybody winced. Poor Naruto.

"Ahem" Tsunade cleared her throat. "Now that the irritating distraction is gone, I was saying that-"

"You would give us an A-rank mission." Naruto butted into Tsunade's speech.

"Yes. I would give you…NARUTOOOOOOOOO!!!" Tsunade punched Naruto again. BAM.

"THAT'S IT! NOW I'M **ANGRY**!" Opps. Angry Tsunade isn't a very nice sight. She changed Team Kakashi's mission scroll and snarled. " You're next mission will be to baby-sit all babies in _Konoha's Daycare Center_!!! This is final!"

"NOOOO…" Naruto wailed. Sakura turned as white as the sheets in the hospital and fluttered to the ground. Their greatest nightmare has come true! The two ANBU blinked. What's so bad about babysitting? It can't be all that bad…right? Tsunade chuckled wickedly.

* * *

Yamato and Sai had huge difficulties in bringing Naruto and Sakura to the Daycare. Yamato had to drag Sakura as she made the best use of he superhuman strength to claw at the earth. Sai had to drag Naruto, who was clinging onto everything he could get a hold on, from lampposts to villages to a returning Hinata, who gave a muffled 'eep' and immediately fainted. Both of them were crying buckets of tears, making the ground soggy. Yamato and Sai were embarrassed to call them their teammates. 

"Come on! You dickless wonder!" Sai grunted as he dragged Naruto.

"I don't wanna…!" Naruto grunt back, clutching onto Akamaru's tail. Kiba swatted his hand away. Naruto grabbed onto him instead.

"We are ANBU. Shinobi. We complete every mission we are assigned to." Sai pulled harder.

"Heck who cares about your stupid rules! I'm not ANBU! I don't care!" Naruto gave up on Kiba and moved on to Shino. Note to self: Never touch an Aburame. Sai finally dragged Naruto away, whose body was covered with charka-eating Kikaichuu bugs.

* * *

Here they are now, at the gates of the horrible, horrible Daycare. Sakura had long given up during the trip and turned into a vegetable. Naruto was creating a miniature lake with the amount of tears he shed and was making a lot of noise. Both remembered what happened during their last mission here. They had a real hard time ridding themselves from those pipsqueaks.

" I'm telling you! The babies here even made Sasuke and Orochimaru go mad!" Naruto was bailing on the floor. "Sakura-chan and I just barely escaped with our sanity. Nee, Sakura-chaaaaan?"

"Sgfgtbkjkrtt…" Sakura gave a senseless reply. Sai raised and eyebrow and Yamato sighed at Naruto's antics.

" Naruto, Sakura. You will co-operate with us on this mission, right…?" Yamato did his 'scary face' on the both of them.

"_Hai_!" They squeaked.

* * *

Soft music was played in the background while pink and blue soap bubbles and sparkles surround our lovely Team Kakashi. Each of them was changing a poop filled diaper. "WHO ARE YOU TRYING TO KID?!" Naruto screamed at the authoresses and ripped the background off.

The babies stared to wail. "Oh, are you hungry? Try some ramen, its good!" Naruto-cum-nanny plopped down a steaming bowl of ramen in front of one.

" Oh! Do you need another diaper?" He tossed a clean sheet of diaper to another. It landed smacked on the poor baby's face.

" Eh? You need to pee? Well, go ahead, don't be modest, I won't watch!" Stress marks after stress marks begin appearing on poor Naruto's forehead and his eye was twitching madly as he bruised himself on calming the whole nursery down. This carried down for a while until the whole center bursts into horrible screeches.

" GAAGH! This is friggin' NOT happening to meeee!!!" Naruto collapsed and joined in with the wailing.

**XXXXXXXXXXX**

Sakura sighed as she fed multiple babies milk all at once, throwing the bottles like kunais, unceremoniously stuffing their face. Crude but effective, this method shuts them up at once.

Sai was trying his best to ignore the babies and took out his drawing tools, all the while tossing babies out of his bag. Yamato got fed up with the wailing and gave a few noisy ones a dose of his famous 'scary face'. They cried even louder. Opps, wrong move, taichou.

"Sensei! You're the ones who drag us here, make yourself useful!" Sakura scolded.

Yamato sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. Chance!

"Ahh…sorry Sakura, but I suddenly remembered about a meeting with Kakashi-sempai about Naruto's training, so if you'll excuse me…" He teleported away with a 'poof' of smoke.

" Iie. That's even more un-useful." Sakura sighed. Baka sensei.

Now Sai, who was once happily drawing, was now swatting babies away with his sketchbook. His neat hair was sticking out in odd directions, under the great pressure of stress he was exposed to.

" I said Get lost, get lost, get lost, and you…! GET LOST!" He screamed.

He finally lost it when a baby with inky feet happily crawled over one of his recent masterpieces, staining it badly.

Seeing this, both Naruto and Sakura each grabbed a handful of babies and jumped to the courtyard. They watched as inked beasts burst forth and destroyed the building…AGAIN.

Now, who to deposit our load with?

* * *

"Konoha is so peaceful eh?" Kakashi asked as he took a slip of green tea. 

BOOM! Down went the daycare. The ANBU and ex-ANBU ignored it.

" Hai, sempai. Konoha is VERY peaceful." Yamato replied as he, too, took a slip of green tea.

* * *

Jiraiya, the toad sanin of Konoha's legendary trio, and mega pervert, was currently doing what he like best. Peeping. At the women's bathhouse. No, no, no…the correct term would be _research_… 

"Ehe, he, he, he, he, he!" He chuckled to himself. Unfortunately, the women heard him and started throwing their soap bottles, towels, tubs and stools at him. He immediately started dogging them.

"Nah, Nah, can't touch me!" He grinned. A chair hit him full in the face. He fell. Hard. 'Damn, I let my guard down. That must be a shinobi…' He sat up and sulked.

" Aww…I wish I could meet a real sexy babe…like…"

"Jiraiya-samaaaa…" Naruto cooed in his orioke form.

"THAT!" Jiraiya finished. " 100 MARKS!" Before he could even start drooling, however, Naruto changed back.

" Well…" Naruto began slyly. " If you wanted babes, you could follow me…"

" Babes?" Jiraiya was practically drooling at the magic words.

" Not just any babes… CUTE babes!"

"How many?" Jiraiya's mouth became a fountain as his drool splashed out.

"Hmm…about one hundred…and you'll be in a room…alone…" Naruto's grin got wider.

Jiraiya fell to the lie easily.

"LEAD THE WAY, GAKI!"

"OSU!"

**XXXXXXXXXXX**

"It's true I said I wanted cute babes…but these are babe-ies! BABIES! NARUUTOOO! GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!" For the first time in his life, the great toad sanin was stumped.

* * *

"Our mission is a success, Tsunade-sama!" Sakura cried joyfully. Team Kakashi stood before their Hokage, wide grins plastered over their faces.

'More like you got rid of them…' Tsunade thought, remembering the last time. Naruto, as if reading her mind, flashed her a cheesy 'not-me-I'm-innocent' grin.

"Would you like to see the success yourself, Tsunade-sama? You seem to doubt us." Sai said, still trying to straighten his hair but was failing miserably.

'Well, at least he looks a bit disheveled. That means that the babies are as active a ever. ' Tsunade thought. ' Poor boy. I pity him.' "Fine. We shall see." She said, eyeing Naruto warily.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXX**

" Tah- Daaaaaah!!!" Tsunade squinted. It was dark. Suddenly, the lights turned on and there, on the couch, lay her perverted teammate, semi-conscious and drowning in a pile of babies. Babies on his clothes, pulling his hair, rolling on the floor, bouncing on the couch, everywhere!

Tsunade turned to Naruto and towered over him menacingly. He gulped nervously.

" Ehe, he, he…! Umm…have fun!"

Then, before she could choke him, he slammed the foolproof Tsunade door shut.

"That brat…! I'll kill him!" She screamed. Now she was stuck with babies! And she does not have anything to punch! Wait…

"Finally…a-a real sexy babe…"

Oh well, there was still Jiraiya. Tsunade flexed her muscles in preparation for the full round trashing she was going to give to her teammate.

* * *

Author's Notes: Taa Daah! Chapter 2 is up! Banzai! We really do love to tourture the sanins, don't we? This is written and typed down by Yuzuki-sama! Of course Sakura-chan helped out too, right? (Did you...?) cough Anyways, the next chapter will be when the Naruto cast is all Jonins already. Stay tuned and the price for reading this is to REVIEW! 


	3. Kiba's Terror The babies KDC III

Disclaimer: If i owned Naruto, I'll be a bullionair by now!

* * *

Konoha Daycare Center III

Kiba joins the team, but does that make any difference?

Takes place when all the Rookie 9 and Team Gai have already become Jonins.Yay! Oh, and Sasuke came back to Konoha, but no, Itachi isn't dead yet. He's too handsome to die!

* * *

"Haruno Sakura, Uzumaki Naruto, Inuzuka Kiba, I will now give you your mission."

"What is it? As long as its anything but the daycare, then I'm happy."

" Too bad for you then. The mission IS the daycare."

"… … NANIIII?"

" Why? Why? Why? Why?" Naruto burst into tears and banged his head on the floor. " I'd rather die!"

" Sasuke-kun! Save us!" Sakura pleaded with Team 7's last team member.

" Hn. I've got another mission today. It requires the usage of the sharingan, so to bad for you then." Sasuke started chuckling madly, something that he picked up from Orochimaru.

" What? What's so bad about the daycare?" Kiba asked.

" KIBA! You'll take back your words AFTER you see Orochimaru."

" But Orochimaru's dead!"

"Yup. The babies polluted his mind."

" You talk big as usual, usuratonkachi. For your information, _I_ was the one who killed him." Sasuke joined in.

" You did not! He committed suicide!"

" How? I saw the way he died in the mind transfer."

" Yeah, he saw your memories of the daycare and decided to end his life right there and then."

" What? How?" Kiba asked.

" Silly, he wrapped his tongue around his neck and tied the tip on the ceiling, thus, hanged himself to death." Naruto and his far-fetched stories.

"…" Everyone sweat-dropped.

" ENOUGH! GO AND BABYSIT, NOOOWW!" Tsunade interrupted.

" Kiba, did you know that baa-chan got swamped too?" Naruto whispered to Kiba.

" NARUUUTOOOOOO!!!!"

Kiba, Naruto and Sakura hastily shushined away, leaving behind poor Sasuke to get crushed Tsunade's fist.

* * *

" Ano…" " BWAAAH!! WAAAHHH!!" "Gaah…"

Naruto stumped on the all-too-familiar floor.

" I can't believe I'm back in this hellhole…" He moaned.

" Sakura seems to be able to cope…" Kiba squatted next to Naruto.

" Well…Sakura-chan's weird. Putting her aside, the rest came out with mental problems."

" I heard that, Naruto-no-baka!" BAAAM.

Yep. Things were going perfectly fine.

* * *

" Noooooooo!!!" Kiba wailed drastically as he saw the state Akamaru was in.

" My…my dog!"

Akamaru has just turned into a walking Christmas tree, except for the fact that babies replaced all the baubles.

" Akamaru! Are you alright?!" Kiba brushed off the babies. That however, made a few chunks of Akamaru's fur come off too.

Naruto and Sakura had napkins tied over their heads and their sleeves were messily rolled up. They were each wiping poo off the floors, tables and chairs manically.

" Kiba! You good-for-nothing dog! Come help!" Naruto hollered across the room. Kiba did not pay attention.

" My- my Akamaru! My kawaii Akamaru's fur looks-looks-looks…Akamaru is BALD!!" Kiba screamed out in horror. Akamaru whined pitifully.

" K-K-Kiba… The babies are attacking!!!" The babies surrounded them. Kiba looked at his dog sorrowfully.

" Sorry boy… but you've got to do it." Kiba cried out dramatically. "Akamaruuu…! I love you!"

" Shut UP, Dog-face. Not like he's gonna die…"

" Yea, Kiba, get real. They're just babies. BABIES."

" Say that when _you're_ in charge of entertaining them!"

A few minutes later, Akamaru came out of the pile, a mountain of babies over him, and his fur sticking out at odd angles.

" AKAMARU! WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO YOU?!" Kiba burst back into sobs. Naruto and Sakura rolled their eyes at the drama.

" Kiba, relax. At least he's not mentally injured. Just physically." Sakura reasoned. Too bad no sense could go into Kiba right now. Sakura gave up and went back to sweeping poo.

" Akamaru! Get off! Get off my beloved Akamaru! What has he ever done to you? He's a nin-dog, not a toy dog!"

" Ahh…and the one who said ' Do it' is who? Huh? Remind me again, Kiba."

" Damate!"

"Oeei! Someone help me clean up over here!" Sakura yelled.

" Yosh. Kiba, you do it!"

" Eh? Why me?"

" … . Just go, Dog-face." Naruto hefted Kiba over his shoulder and threw him across the room.

" GAAAAAAAGH!"

Kiba landed face first into the pile of dung that Sakura just swept up. SPLAT. Kiba smelt the fresh dung and fainted immediately. Pity he's from the Inuzuka clan.

" Mattaku…he's useless." Naruto sighed.

* * *

" Kiba…Kiiibaaa…KIBA! WAKE UP!"

Naruto screamed into poor Kiba's ear. Kiba gave a yelp and awoke immediately. He caught sight of Akamaru, who now had large chunks of fur ripped off.

" Akamaru! What the hell happened to you?!"

" Kiba…"

" The enemy ninja did it, right? Well, where are they? Come on out, coward!"

" No! NO! Kiba, stop!"

" GATSUUGA!"

CRASH

"KIIIBA! I'LL KILL YOU AFTER THIS!" All one-thousand-and-one copies of Naruto screamed. Each had their hair brutally ripped off by the babies they were carrying.

* * *

" Kiiiba no baka…you destroyed it, now who shall we put them with?"

" Dunno…someone with a big house, I guess."

" Okay! Let's put them in the Inuzuka compound!" Naruto cheered and turned to go. Kiba, however, held him back.

" Nani? No way! Do you want my mums' dogs to eat them up?" He exclaimed.

" Then where?" Naruto asked, exasperated.

" Hmm…" Kiba thought for a while. Then… " I know! Hinata has a big house!"

" To the Hyuugas it is, then!" Naruto screamed.

" THE HYUUGAS!" Kiba repeated. The duo ran off, dragging the babies behind them on a big wheelbarrow.

" Guys… I don't think Hiashi-sama is going to be happy…" Sakura sighed.

* * *

" HINATA! OI! HINATAAAA!!!" Hinata opened the door. She saw Naruto there and quickly turned a bright shade of red.

" H-hai, Naruto-kun?" She stuttered.

" Yo, Hinata! Can you take care of those babies for us?" Kiba cheerfully asked.

" Kiba-kun! B-Babies?" Hinata repeated. " Father won't be-"

" Pleeeaase, Hinata?" Naruto gave her his puppy dog eyes.

" …Ano…" Hinata turned and even brighter shade of red.

" Yosh! Lets dump them here!" Kiba and Naruto dumped the babies on the Hyuuga's precious training courtyard and jumped off from the roofs.

" I'm very sorry, Hinata!" Sakura sped off too.

Hinata took one look at the courtyard and sighed.

" Ane-ue? What's up with all the noise?" Hanabi walked forwards and stared at the Hyuuga's once-spotless courtyard. " WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED HERE?!" She shrieked, very un-Hyuuga like.

Hiashi came out of his room to find the source of the commotion. Hyuugas don't usually scream. He saw the two Hyuuga heiresses in the middle of the courtyard, surrounded by babies. Oh, nothing much. Hiashi turned to leave. He stopped. Wait. Babies? He turned around and rubbed his eyes again. Nope, the seas of baldheads were still there. Since when did the Hyuugas reproduced that fast? Those blasted branch house members… He spotted a tuft of yellow. Huh? Yellow hair? In fact, almost all the babies did not have the Hyuuga traits; the pale byakugan eyes, or the brown straggly hair, or the pale skin.

" Hinata! Hanabi! Since when did the branch houses started marring outside the family without my knowledge or approval?" Hiashi was seething.

" Chichi-ue…" Hinata fidgeted with her finger. " Ano…Naruto-kun came and dumped them here…" She told her father and sister what happened.

" Does the Hyuugas look like babysitters? I mean, we're the Hyuugas! The elite of the elite! We are the Konoha's noblest clan, the Hyuuga! Not the Hugging clan!"

" Chichi-ue…"

" I'll kill that blond idiot the next time I see him! How can we be babysitting? How can I, Hyuuga Hiashi, a member of the main house, be babysitting? That moron! That disgusting fish cake! That twerp!"

Hiashi ranted on and on about Naruto while Hinata and Hanabi stood at the sidelines watching their well-respected father go bonkers.

"WAAAAAHH!" The babies' cries cut Hiashi off mid-sentence.

"You do not interrupt Hyuuga Hiashi when he is talking!" Hiashi screamed. You could see steam coming out of his ears now. The babies cried even harder.

" Hinata! Hanabi! Dispatch them!"

" They're babies, Dad. They can't understand you."

" They'd better!"

" The problem is that they can't!"

" M-Maybe someone should entertain them? They will keep quiet that way…"

" Good idea. Hinata, you'll be in charge of the music. Go get your flute."

" What about me?"

" You'll be dancing, Hanabi."

" Eeehhh? Why me?"

" Obviously Hinata can't dance. She'll be better off with the flute anyway."

" Well I can't dance either! I'll be better off playing the tambourine!"

" Well…do you expect **ME** to dance?"

" Yes." Said both of his daughters.

* * *

Hiashi sighed. How on earth did he get into this mess in the first place? He stood foolishly on a platform, the babies wide-eyed and staring at him with his daughters sitting at the sidelines, their instruments ready. And the great Hiashi-sama is wearing a frilly pink _**TUTU**_.

Hiashi's eye started twitching madly. ' I can't believe I'm in a tutu…' he thought, frustrated.

" Go get 'em, Dad!" Hanabi tried to motivate her father.

Both Hanabi and Hinata started playing ' Swan Lake'. Thanks to the mastering of the kaiten, it turns out that Hiashi was good at twirling. Hiashi started hopping around on the platform. He twirled. Did the Pointe, and then pranced off, nearly falling off the small stage, into the eager hands of the waiting evil babies. " Gyaaaaah!" Hiashi screamed in frustration.

Outside the lovely estate, Neji came back from his mission with his annoying sensei in tow.

" No. Out. Uh uh, sit boy." Neji stated coldly to Gai.

If Gai were a dog, he would have wagged his tail as he stupidly complied with Neji's orders.

' _Gyaaaaah!' _Came Hiashi's voice from the inside. Neji acted on instinct.

" Stay boy." He told Gai and started swearing on the sky on the earth that he would save his clan head, Hiashi-sama, from whatever danger he is experiencing.

" Yosh! Lets Go!" And with that, Neji dashed into his waiting doom. Yep. Definitely too much Gai influence.

* * *

" HIASHI-SAMA!!!!" Neji cried and dashed into the courtyard. He was stunned when saw the vast amount of babies staring back at him. Without noticing, he crushed into Hiashi and both of them rolled off the stage.

" GYAAH! NEJI-NO-BAKA!" His angry tutu-wearing uncle screamed. Both got their hair messed up by babies.

" Etto…Hiashi-sama? What's going on?" Neji asked.

" What d'you think is going on? The Hyuugas are being invaded" Dramatic pause. "By BABIES!"

" … … What's so bad about babies…?"

" SEE FOR YOURSELF, NEJI! For God's sake, you have the freaking byakugan! Use them, you idiot!"

Neji used them. He switched them off immediately. Why? Because the effect was disastrous. The babies' charka was too bright and mad! And they were thousands of them! Neji was temporarily blinded.

" Anyways, YOU are going to be dancing with ME!" Hiashi dramatically pointed at Neji.

" Huh?" Neji looked to his left. He looked to his right. No one's there. He looked to Hiashi and pointed to himself. " ME?"

" Yes, you." Hiashi solemnly replied. Neji took a moment for it to register. NO! He was NOT going to wear a freaking tutu! He dashed off immediately. Hiashi was faster, however, and caught hold of Neji's collar.

" Neji! You not going to wear a tutu! I wore this out of professionalism!" Everyone sweat dropped. Neji ran harder.

" I don't care! I'm not twirling!"

" Ganbate, Neji-nii-san!" Hanabi cheered.

"…Poor Neji-nii-san…" Hinata whispered.

* * *

Hinata and Hanabi played Swan Lake. Hiashi and Neji started twirling. This carried on for some time until Neji forgot not to insert his charka and sent the lightweight babies flying into the air.

" Neji you baka! You can't do anything right!" Hanabi screamed as she and her older sister started rapidly collecting the falling babies.

" Neji, you'd better not dance any more… You might end up killing those babies." Hinata said.

" Well, okay then." Neji was more than happy to be sitting down next to his cousins.

" You morons…" Hiashi was left standing on the miniature platform.

* * *

Hiashi gave up. He was twirling with the other unfortunate branch house members for five hours straight. Hinata, Hanabi and Neji were already fast asleep and snoring away.

"THAT DUMB BLOND IDIOT! THE NEXT TIME I SEE HIM I'LL DEFINETEDLY BREAK HIS BONES!"

* * *

Meanwhile at Ichiraku Ramen, Naruto sneezed.

" Ah, damn you Kyuubi! You good-for-nothing fur-ball, you! I wasn't supposed to catch a cold!"

" You stupid kit! There's someone cursing you!"

"SOMEONE'S CURSING ME? AAAAAAAAAAAH! I can't die an early death yet! I haven't even become Hokage! AAAAAAAAAAAHH! Oh my God, what am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do?"

"… … … Shut up kit."

* * *

Author's Note: Yaaaay! KDC III is out! We have up to KDC IV (5), so stay tune and wait for more news! Since you even bothered to read this piece of crap, I'll tell you the next chapter's Title! It is " Babysitting? Call the AKATSUKI. KDC IIII.". Akatsuki fans! Make sure to check!


	4. Babysitting Call the Akatsuki KDC IIII

Konoha's Daycare Center IIII

**Disclaimer: **Naruto belongs to some very creative guy in japan. I thank him for comming out with such a brilliant story.

**Author's notes**: I thank the handful of you who rated.The Naruto casts are all **ANBU** already. And Deidara, Hidan, Kakuzu is still alive. Enjoy:

Babysitting? Call the Akatsuki. KDC IIII.

* * *

" Now, your next mission will be to protect a certain building…" The granddaughter of the great Shodaime, Tsunade, was currently drowning in her paperwork. Tsunade eyed the ANBUs in front of her. Blondie, Blackie, and Pinky, AKA Fox, Raven and Cat respectively. 

" What are we protecting, Tsunade-sama?" Raven inquired. Fox interrupted.

" Building? So now we're security guards? Good going, Tsunade-no-baa-chan." He whined.

" Kitsune shut your freaking mouth up." Cat snapped.

" What are we protecting, Tsunade-sama?" Raven repeated his question, irritated, at the same time glaring daggers at his stupid teammate, Fox.

Tsunade gave an evil smirk. They had it coming for a loooong time. "

" You will be protecting, **Konoha's Daycare Center**."

Pause. Everyone fell to the floor. " NO! I quit! I quit! Uzumaki Naruto is NOT participating!" Naruto jumped up, wiped off his Fox mask and threw a tantrum.

" Hokage-sama, that is just plain Cruel." Sasuke's Raven mask had fallen off with shock, but he regained his wits and caught it in time.

" Shishou, let Ino-pig do it, Why me?" Sakura whined.

" It's payback for not completing it the last three times. Now, Go!" Tsunade barked. Team 7 grudgingly trotted out of the door. Oooo, she really loves her position as Hokage now.

* * *

" Muahahahahaha…" The Akatsuki made their appearance. So far, the only ones present were Zetsu, Tobi, Deidara, Itachi and Kisame. 

" Leader-sama said to –what- Konoha?" Tobi asked.

" To kidnap the future generation of Konoha, or whatever it is." Zetsu groaned. "Why? Just why do we have to bring, of all people, Tobi? Why not Kakuzu?"

" 'Cause Kakuzu would just kill everybody in sight, them sell them, Hm." Deidara replied. _' And because Tobi is my freakin' partner…'_ He thought moodily.

" Well, enough with this useless banter. Lets go." Itachi grunted. Why even bother with the future generation? Just kill the Hokage or set one of the tailed beast on them. Stupid leader, stupid Konoha.

* * *

Team 7 found themselves in front of a cheery pink painted building. They all sighed simultaneously. No other babies can be as terrifying as the ones in Konoha's Daycare Center. It seems that being ANBU doesn't really change anything. 

Sasuke could vaguely remember the day when Kabuto informed them that the one and only Daycare Center in Konoha has been rebuilt, and all babies have been registered again. He thought he took the news pretty badly, screaming his lungs out and pulling his hair, but Orochimaru took it worser than him. The snake sanin would go into hysterics whenever the words 'baby' was mentioned.

Naruto sighed. " Well, lets do it, Sakura-chan, Sasuke-teme."

With that, team 7 walked forwards to brave the horrors of the babies.

* * *

Smarter now, the members of Team 7 walked into the room with earplugs plugged firmly into their ears. As if on cue, the babies burst into tears. 

" Ichi…" Naruto counted.

Members readied their fist.

" Ni…"

Their mouths tightened.

"San…GO!"

The trio's fingers flashed into complicated seals. After the last one was completed, the babies fell asleep immediately.

" Ahh...Silence at last." Sakura smugly removed her earplugs with a 'pop'.

" Of course! I've been practicing this jutsu just incase a situation like this arises. Genjutsu isn't really my thing, you know." Naruto flashed his foxy grin and gave a ' nice guy pose'.

" Usuratonkachi, you know, that pose makes you lamer than you already are." Sasuke snorted.

" Oh yeah? At least I came up for an answer to deal with those babies! If not, you'll probably get your hair yanked out! Again!"

" Tch. I'll kill those babies before they even touch me. Meet my Uchiha Death Glare level 2!"

" Ha! As if like that'll work. You picked it up from Orochimaru right? His glares are so sissy, they won't work right!"

" So? Jiraiya can't even glare right! All he does is stare!"

"Hmp! And remind me again, who's the one who got swamped?"

" Guys…"

" You don't talk big. You got swamped after ME!"

"Guys…!"

" You want to fight, TEME?"

" Bring it on, Usuratonkachi!"

" GUYS! SHUT UP!"

They kept quiet immediately. Sakura's temper grew fouler and fouler with each passing year, another thing to curse the old baa-chan for. After blissful silence, which only lasted for a few seconds, Naruto went " Can I blast this bloody place up?"

" No." Sakura stiffly replied.

" But Sakura-chaaaan…!"

" No attacking the place we were supposed to protect!"

" Hai."

After a few more seconds, then,

"Yosh! Everyone evacuate, 'cause I'm gonna use rasengan and blast this place to smithereens!!!"

" Naruto! I said no attacks!"

" Rasengan isn't an attack!"

" Then what is it?"

" It's the FOURTH'S attack!"

" You…wouldn't dare…" Sakura gritted her teeth angrily.

" Ha! Watch me."

" Does Chidori falls under a similar category?" Sasuke asked hopefully.

" Of course, Teme! Let's do this!"

" For once, I agree with the Dope."

The boys powered up their jutsus.

" RASENGAN!" " CHIDORI!"

" You two…SHANNAROOOO!!!"

Crash. A big hole was planted right smack in the center or the daycare's floor, not by Naruto or Sasuke, but by Sakura. The good thing- the boys finally shut up. The bad thing- the babies were awoken from their genjutsu.

" WAAAAHHHH!!!"

" Lets…escape from the scene of the crime, shall we?" Naruto gulped. The baa-chan was going to give it to him. Big time.

" Yes…Lets." Sasuke, the Uchiha heir was drenched with cold sweat.

" SCRAM!" The shouted over the din.

* * *

" This is the place?" The five of them felt foolish, standing outside a cheery building painted full of unicorns and rainbows and butterflies…and URRGH!! The all stared at the sigh on the doorway, which cheerfully proclaimed " Konoha's Daycare Center." 

" Well…let's go then." Itachi sighed. "Best get this over and done with."

" HAI." the rest replied sullenly.

* * *

They entered only to find- " ITACHI! " " GASP! THE AKATSUKI!" 

Shit. Why must these irritating kids be here?!

" ITACHI! PREPARE TO DIE!"

" SASUKE! LEAVE THE REST OF THEM AKATSUKI TO ME!"

" Babysitting, little brother? Have you really stooped that low?"

" For you're information, its not babysitting, its called 'protecting' this god forsaken building. And in case you don't know, I'm already ANBU. The elite. The strongest. See this uniform I'm wearing? See it? But anyways, you shouldn't even be remembering this piece of information because I am gonna go there, cut you right here and now, dig out your guts and feed it to a dull weasel, then use chidori and-"

Beside him, Naruto was giving the rest the same lengthy speech. Only a bit stupider.

" –I'll definitely kill you because I am going to be HOKAGE! And do you even know what a hokage is? It's the strongest ninja of the entire village! And after I become Hokage, I'll also defeat all the other kages and become the Kage of Kages! Then, I'll find all the other jinchuurikis and we'll combine our forces and unite! By then, you won't be able to kill me any longer because-"

All the Akatsuki gave simultaneous yawns.

" This is how you're going to kill us? Bore us the death? Absolutely interesting." Kisame snickered.

" You guys, let's just escape." Sakura whispered.

" NEVER!!!" Naruto and Sasuke shrieked.

" We'll just trap the in here…WITH the babies." Sakura reasoned.

At the thought of the Akatsuki stuck with a bunch of babies, Naruto and Sasuke's faces broke into wide grins.

" 1…2…3…SCRAM!"

Well, the Akatsuki hadn't expected that. They were-running? Behind, they could hear the building's windows and doors being locked and bolted. They? Trap them? From what? " WAAAAHHHH!!" Oops. They forgot about the babies they were supposed to kidnap.

* * *

Itachi at once tried putting the babies into genjutsu, but whenever a pile slept, another pile would replace them. And when this pile slept, yet another one would take over. And when this one slept, the first pile would be awake by then and take over. There was no end to them. Next, Itachi at once tried glaring, but found out the hard way that the babies were immune to the Uchiha's Death Glare. Too bad, Itachi. 

Tobi, however, was having the time of his life entertaining the babies and not even bothering to save the drowning Uchiha at the corner who was screaming: " NOT THE HAIR!!!" Are all Uchiha members hair-obsessed?

Zetsu was sulking at the opposite corner, with babies sliding down his flytrap decoration...thingy. Suddenly, a baby's poop landed on his head with a splat.

"Ha! It looks like someone has given you a nice dose of fertilizer. You really need that stuff, you know?" Kisame sniggered. Until a toddler waddled up to him and stared.

" What?" Kisame snapped. The toddler just stared. And stared. And STARED. Kisame stared back, except his is more evil. Soon, Kisame was engaged in a staring contest. Finally, the toddler opened his mouth to say one word:" Fish."

Kisame's eye twitched. " Fish." That puny thing repeated the Taboo word. " Fish. Fish. Fish. Fish. Fish. Fish!!!" the wrinkled thing, delighted at having found a new word, started chanting.

" I'M NOT A FISH!!!" Kisame roared. That stared a crazy game of tag with the former going: fish, fish, fish, fish, fish, FISH!!! And Kisame screaming his gills off, all the while trying to catch that puny brat and planning on throttling him hard and then hang him up by the collar and use him as a punching bag.

" Ha! Now Kisame is going crazy, un." Deidara flipped back his hair girlishy and turned around.

" Wa-wa-wa-wait! DON'T TOUCH THAT!"

A baby was happily prodding one of Deidara's many explosive clays curiously. Deidara dashed towards the clay in the speed of light and just as he was carefully putting it back, the baby made a gurgled noise, which sounds uncannily like 'katsu'. BOOOM. Poor Deidara, who was mid-way into removing the chakra from the clay bomb, was now crispy black and smoking badly.

" Curse you." He managed to stutter out before collapsing on the floor, before being swamped by babies too.

" Next time, don't leave your stupid clays lying around, baka." Zetsu's 'white' half snarled.

" Or else I'll devour your body too." The 'black' half sniffed. PLOP. Another poo landed, adding to the already collecting pile. Both sides groaned.

" Wow, Zetsu-sama! Are these babies potty-trained or what? They know that you need it. They KNOW!" Tobi just had to rub salt to the wound. Surprisingly, he was the only one not being harassed by any babies.

Tobi looked at Zetsu. He was manically trying to peel the babies off his flytrap, but couldn't really reach the tip, so all the babies crawled up there and overbalanced him. He fell heavily to the ground. Plop. Down went another poo.

Tobi looked at Kisame, who now attracted a bunch of talking babies, all who was crawling at his feet, tugging merrily at the hem of his cloak, and all the while chanting "Fish fish fish fish fish fish fish fish fish …" " NOOOO…" The newly named 'fish' groaned.

Deidara and Itachi, who both currently being swamped by babies who wanted their mother and attacked the nearest people who looked like a girl, were going mentally unstable with each passing moment. The latter screaming " Not the hair! This is the most well groomed hair among all Uchihas! Not some chicken butt style like Sasukes'! NOT THE HAIR! ANYTHING BUT THE HAIR! " and the former too burnt to even struggle.

Tobi sighed. " You're all hopeless. Pathetic."

" Well, since you're so smart, you do something, then." Kisame panted with the effort of trying to catch the giggly babies and the only one still sane enough to reply.

" Look." Tobi stacked up the colourful IKEA plastic tables to create a makeshift stage. He took out a baton from the folds of his cloak and waved it with flourish.

Like hypnotized, the babies stopped moving. " FISH-" Tobi started but was cut off with an indigent 'hey!' from Kisame.

" Fish." Echoed the babies. 'WTF' everyone was thinking. Tobi waved the baton around and the babies surprisingly broke into a high-pitch squealing and squeaky song, comprised of the only word they knew, 'fish'.

" Tobi…I'll…k-kill you…" Kisame was struggling to get across the room so that he can grab Tobi and strangle him to his death. That failed and Kisame ended up turning a violent shade of red. Clashing with his blue skin, he somehow ended up turning purple instead.

* * *

" GOOD!" The babies finished singing their fishy song. Kisame was now a pile of goo at the corner. " Now, the sentence is 'Zetsu needs fertilizer.' " Tobi was waving his baton around like a man possessed. The babies who could sing broke into garbled versions of the song. Those who could not started donating more poop to Zetsu to prove their point. Zetsu shut his flytrap with a snap so that no one can see his tomato red face. 

" Tobi, are you just here to embarrass us, un?" Deidara was screaming at the back of the room, trying to make Itachi's hair like what it was before, which was no easy feat after what the babies did.

Deidara, who was still smoking, angrily tugged at a knot, still ranting on and on about how stupid his partner is. " That idiotic sissy moron, if he can't control those babies then just kill them already!"

" Leader-sama said to kidnap them, not kill them." Itachi absently said as the checked his hair in a pink mirror for any more knots.

" Well, stuff them into a bag or something and let's finish this bloody mission!"

" Well, my little otouto locked us in here, remember? How dare he use the glare on the babies and make them immune to it…" Itachi muttered curses under his breath as he squinted at his reflection. 'Damn…I need a pair of glasses ' he thought. But glasses make him look like a nerd. Look at Kabuto! And glasses made him look sissier than he already is; he was trying to conserve what little manliness he has left.

Deidara carried on his banter." He's a gay! What the heck is leader-sama thinking, un?! That Tobi can't even GLARE! It's an essencial trait for all criminals! Even those low-life D-rank missing-nins can do that! Is he even a S-rank? He's ruining our reputation!"

" Look who's talking. Deidara-sempai, you're gayer than I am!" Note to self: Never insult Tobi. After several whispered words with the babies, Tobi smugly waved his baton like some crazy freak trying to do magic. You could practically feel the glare from under the mask. The babies broke into song.

:"MUMMY! I WANT MY MUMMY! WHERE IS MY MUMMY? OH! THERE MY MUMMY IS!" The cheerful babies swamped over to the two sissies at the back. " NOT THE HAIR!" The two of them screamed.

After this horrifying mission, the five Akatsukis would never go to Konoha again, leaving a very confused Hidan, Kakuzu, Pein and Konan behind.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Sorry for the long delay! I apologise for making you wait. Then again, this story only has 2 or 3 alerts, so not much to miss anyway. 

Watch out for the next and **final **chapter of KDC.

* * *


	5. Sabotaging the Sand Siblings! KDC IV

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Masashi...i've been forced to say this one hundred times already...it makes me feel sad...

Author's notes: Presenting the last and final chapter of KDC! The Naruto cast are already ANBU captain and Naruto has secured the position of Hokage!...or so he thinks. Thanks to those fans who reviewed and alerted/favourited it! Now, sit back and enjoy:

**Konoha Daycare Center IV**

**Sabotaging the Sand Siblings**

* * *

Tsunade surveyed the number one loudmouth and most surprising ninja in Konoha…and the soon to be Rokudaime Hokage.

"Naruto."

" Nani, Baa-chan?"

" Don't call me that!" Tsunade was long tired of Naruto calling her that name and she gave up on punching him every time he said it. "You will have to do one last mission before I'll give you my title."

"Eh? Another mission? A rank? S rank?"

" NO…"

" Yaaaay!!! I'm gonna do a Hokage level mission!"

" Shut up and listen, gaki!" Bam. Poor Naruto.

" What is it then?"

" …D rank."

"…"

"…"

" NANI? BAA-CHAN! I'M ANBU CAPTAIN! THE HOKAGE IN WAITING! WHY D-RANK?!"

Tsunade couldn't stand it anymore and released her temper full blast at that stupid brainless Naruto. To her great dismay, Naruto recovered quickly.

" Baaaaaa-chaaaaan…." He whined.

Naruto switched to his pleading puppy dog mode.

" Please? Please say that I can become Hokage? Please?"

The effect was too great for Tsunade. She sighed.

" Fine, but-"

"Really? Yaaay!"

" AFTER YOU COMPLETE YOUR D-RANK MISSION AT **KONOHA DAYCARE CENTER**!"

Silence. It was so quiet until you could hear a pin drop on the floor. Naruto's jaw hit the floor. For once, he was absolutely silent. Then-

" WAAAAAAHHH!" He wailed like a baby. " NANDE? NANDE 'TEBAYO? NANDE?" He threw a fit and banged his fists against the floor.

At the same time, five poofs were heard in the office that was being flooded by Naruto's tears. The ANBUs hurriedly expelled chakra from their feet to stand on the lake of tears so that their shoes won't get wet.

Tsunade cleared her throat. " Ahh…you're here. Naruto, pick any two ANBU here to accompany you for your mission."

Naruto's crying ceased immediately. He got an evil gleam his eye. The ANBUs shivered.

" Any two?"

* * *

" Sasuke-teme." No respond from the five. Looks like Sasuke didn't want to go.

" Come out, teme. I know which one you are…Aha! There! Teme is under the Raven mask!"

Caught, Sasuke angrily swiped off his mask, gave the blond idiot a murderous glare and stalked off to Naruto's side. Naruto gave the remaining four a foxy grin.

" Saaakura- chaaan!"

Immediately as he said that, the one wearing a cat mask pulled back a fist and slammed it onto poor Naruto's face. He went flying across the room. Then Sakura grudgingly stomped over to her teammates.

The three remaining ANBU gave great sighs of relief. Dog-masked Kiba trotted off happily, stopping in front of a seething Sakura, grinned and said seriously, " Good luck. I pity you guys, I really do."

He then sushined away before Sakura could punch him to bits.

" Ano…good luck, guys. And try not to bring them over to the Hyuuga compound…Chichi-ue is still mad about the last incident…" Hinata brushed past the two, her sheep-mask swinging gently on her belt. It was true. After pulling out Naruto's disgustingly bright stock of yellow hair and pelting him with fish cakes, Hisashi was left traumatized of babies and still had the urge to twirl at unexpected moments.

Neji took off his eagle mask, looked Sasuke in the eyes, put a hand on his shoulders, and went," I pity you, Sasuke…and don't bring them to the Hyuugas, whatever you do." Then he swept past, remembered the time he barely managed to escape from the horrible pink tutu and shivered uncontrollably.

Sasuke and Sakura stood there, looking depressed, lonely and swollen. A cold wind blew past.

" Muahahaha…If I suffer, you will suffer too!!!" Came Naruto's voice from behind. His pissed off teammates punched him on the head.

" Owww! C'mon, after this, we'll burn that place up and I'll make an order that it will never be rebuilt again! Ever!"

" Are you serious? "

" Dead serious. After this mission, I'll be Hokage!"

The two of them stepped up beside Naruto and jubilantly cheered. " LET'S GO!"

* * *

" Listen up, all you babies of Konoha's Daycare!" Naruto smartly pranced down the makeshift stage, flanked by Sasuke and Sakura. The babies surrounded their sides.

" Attention to all babies of Konoha's Daycare Center! As of now, I officially declare myself as Rokudaime Hokage of the great shinobi village, Konoha! And ever since I walked into this miserable room when I was thirteen, I had already decided. I WILL DEFINETELY BLAST GODFORSAKEN PLACE DOWN TO BITS! Now, my lifelong dream has finally come true! As Rokudaime of Konoha, this daycare is to be demolished and never rebuilt again!" Naruto declared loudly to his five months old audience.

And since they were five months old and could not understand human language, no one clapped. Naruto dropped pathetically to the floor in defeat.

**00000000000000**

" Ne, ne, Sakura-chan, ladies first!"

" Pleasure."

Sakura marched towards the building and gave it a mighty punch. The roof carved in with a loud crash.

" Now, usuratonkachi?"

" Gladly, Sasuke-teme!"

Sakura turned around to see two red-eyed boys holding their two sparkly blue jutsus on their right palm and running manically towards her, laughing with glee at the thought of no more babies. Forever.

" **RASENGAN!!!**" " **CHIDORI!!!"**

The main building exploded and the wood splinters flew all the way from Konoha to Oto. One fragment hit a weeping Kabuto.

"Oww…Dammit! Nande? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO HANG YOURSELF? WAAAH! I'm so lonely without youuuu, Orochimaru-saaamaaa...!!!"

* * *

" Um…Guys…? Are we forgetting something?" Naruto nervously asked.

" …?"

"OH KAMI-SAMA! THE BABIES!!!" The trio started screaming in unison. Naruto started hyperventilating and was screaming nonsensical stuff like ' I'll never become Hokage like this!' and ' that freaking baa-chan will kill me, chop off my bloody head, and hang it in her office!'

Sasuke was doing the opposite of what Naruto was doing. Yes, he was smirking quietly in the corner. And yes, he already knew that the babies were still inside the building when he Chidori-ed it. Oh, of course he knew, he was an Uchiha! Good thing Naruto was as clueless as ever. Those hair-pulling babies were dead! At last!

" Oi! Teme! We're gonna hafta rescue them ugly babies!"

As soon as that sentence left Naruto's lips, Sasuke's hopes and dreams were shattered. He knelt down and repeatedly bashed his head against the hard concrete floor.

" Tasketeee…" He wailed as Naruto dragged him off to the building's remaining ruins.

" Good luck, Sasuke-kun!" Sakura snickered.

* * *

" Yes. Please wait here, Kazekage-dono. The Rokudaime will be here soon."

" Strange, huh? Our cute little Naruto as Hokage…ne, Gaara?" Temari remarked.

Gaara stood sulking away at the corner, like usual. Temari continued polishing her fan as she chatted with Shikamaru, their lazy guide, who was dozing off. And Kankuro was re-applying his make-up…err… face paint.

" GAARA! GAAARAAAA!!!"

Everyone in the room groaned. The door smashed open to reveal Konoha's newest Hokage. The Hokage-in-orange swaggered in with a half dead Sasuke and a hyper Sakura. And the three were dragging along with them ten cartloads full of babies.

" Gaara! I'm kinda busy right now, so can you take care of them?"

" …"

" Yosh! Gaara says it's okay! Dump them here, guys!"

"…Did I say yes, Naruto?"

Naruto balantly ignored him.The trio dashed in and hurriedly emptied the cartloads of babies onto the floor.

" Okay! Now who wants some Sake?"

" ME!"

Then the trio dashed off and bolted the door shut.

The sand siblings toward over the only Konoha-ian in the room, their poor guide, Shikamaru.

" Damn those troublesome idiots…!" Shikamaru muttered darkly under his breath as he faced the wrath of Suna's three most terrifying ninjas.

* * *

" Shikamaru! Do something!"

The genius thought for awhile.

" Kagemane no jutsu!" He stopped their movements and entertained them by doing al sorts of funny movements.

" Nice…" The sand siblings breathed a sigh of relief. However, after an hour, Shikamaru, who was depleted of chakra after holding one thousand and one babies still. He got fed up with this troublesome task that troublesome Hokage got him into and released the troublesome jutsu.

" That's it. I'm out. If you wanna take it out on someone, then do it on the Troublesome Naruto, not me."

Then he poofed off, leaving them to fend for themselves against those horrifying babies. Too bad, guys. The daycare center may be gone, but the babies aren't.

Crap.

**00000000000000**

Kankuro was very upset. His beloved puppets were on exhibition for those baldheads, stripped off its weapons and poisons! Ahhh!

" It's a tragedy! My weapons! My beloved puppets!"

" Your dolls, you mean."

" Yes! My do-wait! Temari! I do NOT play with dolls!"

Plat. Karasu's hand was yanked out by those babies. Kankuro shrieked. " KARASUUUU!!!"

Kankuro ran around the room, his hands failing around wildly.

" Kankurooo…" Gaara's eerie voice rang across the room.

" H-hai, Otouto…?" Kankuro squeaked.

" Shut up." Kagekage-sama is in a foul mood today.

" Hai, Otouto!"

" I do not acknowledge an idiot such as you as my brother. So shut up and DON'T call me that." Gaara sat at the corner and continued sulking.

"… Hai, Otouto."

_Sabaku Kyuu! _

* * *

Gaara's eye twitched. He had sacrificed his gourd and the sand is now splattered on the floor, with babies happily playing in it. And also an unconscious Kankuro in it too.

" Mmmm…what a nice cosy sandbag…" Kankuro mumbled, and snuggled in it to make himself more comfortable. Temari was sniggering in the corner at her two little brothers. And Gaara was not happy.

" Fine. Let's see how nice it is now." Gaara inserted more pressure to the sand. Kankuro woke up immediately. And saw sand all over him.

" GAARA! Help! I'm dying! I'm dying!" Gaara removed all the sand from the floor and formed it back into his usual gourd. Which made the babies cry due to the loss of their newfound toy. They all swamped over to Kankuro.

" GAARA! Help! I'm dying! I'm dying!"

" Are you a parrot or something, Kankuro?!"

" That baka of a brother." Temari sighed and blew the babies into the air, thus, Kankuro was freed. But then Temari released the jutsu as fast as she did it, making the flying babies rain upon the both of them. Well, Temari had quick enough reflexes and hid behind her fan, but Kankuro had a mountain of babies stacked over him.

" GAARA! Help! I'm dying! I'm dying!" Kankuro frantically started attaching as many as possible chakra strings to those babies closest to him and flung them away. Out of sight, out of mind. However, there were still too many babies around him to get them out of _sight_, forget about _mind_. Soon, Kankuro's strings were maxed out and Gaara had to cover both his siblings with his wall of sand, least they die.

The door opened. " So Gaara! Did you have fun?" Ahhh…The brat is here.

" Uzumaki Narutoooooo…." Gaara called out in his super creepy voice.

Naruto gulped. " I'm the Hokage, dattebayo! I forbid you to kill me!" He squeaked.

" I don't give a damn if you're Hokage! I am the Kazekage! AND I'LL RIP YOU TO SHREDS!!!"

The sand forming the barrier reconstructed itself and formed a hand, reaching out to grab and yank out one of Naruto's limbs. Naruto dashed off immediately, with Gaara hot at his heels.

" Uzumaki Naruuuuutoooo…! Wheerree aaare yooouuu!?"

" Gaah! Don't kill me! Don't kill me! I absolutely forbid you to do that! DON'T KILL ME!"

" I will!"

" You won't!"

" Will!"

" Won't!"

" Will!"

" Won't!"

" Will!" …

The villages could see orange and red blurs across their rooftops that day. It looks like poor Kazekage-sama finally broke. That day, Gaara realized that Konoha's babies were even scarier than him! And he was born with the Shukaku! He was extremely thankful that Suna did not have those Oni babies. Scary indeed.

**00000000000000**

Meanwhile…

" TEMARI! Help! I'm dying! I'm dying!"

" GAARA! HOW DARE YOU RUN AWAY! COWARD! THAT'S WHY I HATE BOYS! I LOATHE THEM TO THE CORE!"

"…Even Shikamaru?"

" WHO WOULD LIKE THAT IDIOT ANYWAY?!"

" …Even me?"

" Yes, but that's not the point!"

Both Temari and a whimpering Kankuro were drowning in the sea of babies in the office.

" **GAARA! HOW COULD YOU FORGET YOUR OWN BIG SISTER AND BROTHER!?"**

* * *

**Author's Notes: **Yes, this is the last chapter of KDC. Don't ask us for sequels or anything, 'cause there won't be any. But we are currently doing another story similar to KDC, so check our profile for any updates! Thanks to those who read loyally through these five chapters! Hontou ni Arigato Gozaimasu!

Remember: Watch out for the new story! And for those who celebrate: **Happy Chinese New Year! Gong Xi Fa Cai!** Sorry, we've got no red packets on us but this chapter should be enough, ne?


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